It feels like it'll never end, like I'll never manage to be able to start over. I just keep telling myself I can do it. I've done it before.

Today is one of those days. Got a letter from an apartment complex I'd applied to. I was really hoping that it'd be okay. I guess I should have expected them to turn me down, but to have it be only because they insist that hubby and I owe them money? Um. No.

I shouldn't owe them anything. I did nothing wrong. I didn't know about VAWA, I didn't know I could have asked for the lease to be split into two, didn't know I could have talked to the housing authority separately about the problems he caused with the assistance and could have asked them to split the agreement and leave assistance with me & the kids. I didn't know anything. Now that I do, it's probably too late.

I am angry. How can I be blamed for things I didn't do, had no control over, and tried desperately to fix? The whole time I was trying to fix everything, my husband sat there, doing nothing to help. Maybe bankruptcy is an option.

Labels: abuse, children, domestic violence, financial abuse, recovery, survivor